Dirty Cheating Slytherins
by Ringwraith9
Summary: Harry, Ron, and Hermione find out that the Slytherins are cheating on their Potions exam.What will they do?
1. Good Luck Goyle

Dirty cheating Slytherins

   I am writing this fan fiction without authors permission or any intent to copyright or market said fiction.

   "Potions exams are always hard, but this is sure to be an especially nasty one," said Hermione.

     " Yeah," said Ron, miserably," I think Professor Snape gave us all those poison potions hoping we'd just kill ourselves rather than take the test.

      " Harry, are you all right," questioned Hermione.

      Harry was staring at the Slytherin table. The three young wizards were in the Great Hall at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Everyone in the school was separated into one of four school houses. Although there was no rule that students had to eat with people in their own house that was how it usually ended up.

      " Yeah ," said Harry," It just seems that Draco is covered with more than the usual amount of admirers today. I wonder what he is up to."

      Harry and his friends were rivals of Draco Malfoy. Not because of his popularity, but what he chose to do with it. Harry was much more revered in most of the school houses but chose to make friends uninterested in popularity and power.

   At the Slytherin table, a small skinny boy stood patting a larger, seated boy on the back.

   "Good luck on the exam ,Goyle," Draco smirked.

     If anyone had ,at that moment , seen that smirk and the arrogant raise of the boys thin eyebrows, they would have seen him at once for what he was. It was the kind of smirk that you saw on the face of a person that knew two things. Firstly , that none was as good as he was and secondly that if they were they didn't have the kind of money to back it up with.

      " Goyle, pass an exam," Hermione snorted," That will be the day."

      " Well, he has passed five years of wizarding school," said Ron around a mouthful of cupcake.

      " I'd really like to know how," whispered Hermione," Oh no! We've been here an hour. Its really time to start studying." 


	2. Peeves and the Paper

Peeves and the Paper

Yeah. Fan fiction is working again. As before I have no permission to write, sell, or even think this story up. So here goes.

Hermione, Harry, and Ron left the great hall and started towards the Gryffindor common room. 

ÒOw,Ó said Harry suddenly.

ÒWhat is the matter,Ó asked Ron.

ÒSomeone threw a paper ball at me,Ó said Harry.

The three looked around but there was no one to be seen. Suddenly the children were pelted with crumpled papers.

ÒPoor ickle Gryffindors being hit with naughty paper balls. Hurry along and study now,Ó a pseudo sympathetic voice from the ceiling cackled with laughter.

ÒPeeves, we should have known,Ó said Harry exasperated,Ó Sometimes heÕs more trouble than heÕs worth.Ó

Ò I heard that,Ó said the poltergeist, flying through the head of a startled Hermione before drifting away.

ÒHey Hermione, are you okay,Õ asked Harry.

ÒLook at this,Ó said Hermione in a quiet tone. She held up a crumpled piece of paper and in the right hand corner it read Draco Malfoy and under that Potions exam 6.

ÒPeeves must have gotten it out of the Slytherin common room,Ó said Ron.

Ò But we havenÕt had the sixth exam yet,Ó said Hermione,Ó I bet thatÕs what Malfoy was showing the others at lunch. Somehow heÕs gotten the answer key for the next exam.Ó

ÒI canÕt wait to see his face when we turn him in,Ó said Ron.

ÒAre you crazy,Ó exclaimed Harry,Ó if we turn him in who is going to believe that we didnÕt use that answer key. Besides Snape probably gave it to him. HeÕd do anything for his precious Slytherins.

Ò Well,Ó said Hermione,Ó weÕll just have to give it to a Gryffindor.Ó

Ò What do you mean,Ó asked Ron.

Ò I mean that we just need to leave it somewhere an honest Gryffindor will find it and bring it to SnapeÕs attention,Ó said Hermione.

ÒWhat Gryffindor would Snape listen to,Ó asked Harry.

ÒI know one,Ó said Ron, smiling. 

ÒDumbledore,Ó they said in unison.


	3. Caught Redhanded

Third chapter. Making them short because I don't really know how much 3000 kilobytes are. Oh still haven't got permission to write this story or sell it. Just as well don't think anyone would buy it.  
  
"I can't believe it,"said Ron," He never said a sword. It was like Snape didn't care if people cheated."  
"I know, and did you see how smug the Slytherins looked before the exam," said Hermione.  
"Maybe Dumbledore didn't find the letter,"said Harry," Although it was odd. Snape didn't even give his usual lecture about cheating before the test. It makes me wish we had used the key."  
"No you don't," contradicted Hermione," That would be the same as accepting help from Draco Malfoy."  
"Perish the thought," laughed Harry.  
The next morning in Potions class everything was eerily quiet. The students were all at their desks and Snape was sitting upon his facing the class. He looked rather like a vulture eyeing his next meal. No one had said a word for twenty minutes as Snape gazed at each student accusingly, as if trying to spot some spot of guilt on their faces.  
There was suddenly a loud crash. Everyone looked to the back of the classroom. Neville was sprawled on the floor beneath his chair.  
"The l-leg broke, p-professor," he stammered.  
"Five points from Gryffindor for destroying school property," Snape said harshly. He continued in a chillingly cold voice," It has come to my attention today that someone in this class has been breaking into my storeroom and duplicating the answer key. Such scholarly slovenliness will not be tolerated in my classroom. The idiot who cannot retain the information to pass a simple potions exam will never escape the notice of myself. Tonight, I will mix a complex anti cheating potion and dip the test papers into it. Whichever papers belong to guilty students will turn red as will their owners. I would not like to be a scarlet hue on the morrow."  
He was glaring angrily at the table which Ron, Harry, and Hermione were occupying. He continued to stare at them for the remainder of the class and their outbursts of gleeful laughter caused Gryffindor to lose quite a few points. 


	4. Blast Ended Screwts

Blast Ended Screwts  
  
Hi . This is the last chapter. Today. I will wait for reviews before finishing I may get some insights. Yeah Yeah still cant sell this writing still don't own Harry Potter or even one of the other characters.  
  
" Ha! Did you see him staring at us. He really thinks we did it," said Harry.  
Ron chortled," Imagine when all the Slytherin papers turn red."  
"Imagine when all the Slytherins turn red," laughed Hermione,"They'll have to change their house colors."  
"Oh, wait," said Harry," We have a Quidditch match against them tomorrow. This is going to be hilarious."  
Harry and Ron went to the boys dormitory. Hermione went to the girls. They quickly washed up and went to bed. They wouldn't sleep in tomorrow for the world.  
The next morning the students hurriedly got dressed and rushed downstairs. Word had quickly spread from the sixth year students about what had happened in potions. Everyone was eager to see who had changed colors.  
They were to be disappointed. While all the other house tables were bustling with hyper activity, the Slytherin table was almost deserted. Seated there were two lone figures, Draco Malfoy and the Bloody Baron. They were apparently engaged in deep conversation, as they apparently ignored the other houses. Normally, the other houses couldn't resist teasing the Slytherins; but the Bloody Barons grim countenance seemed to forbid intrusion.  
So, instead, they had to content themselves with inventing wild rumors as to what the Slytherins punishment had been.  
"Maybe they're all expelled," said Neville in a shocked tone. He couldn't imagine what his grandmother would do if he were expelled.  
" Don't be thick, " said Fred, one of Ron's two older twin brothers, " You can't expel an entire house."  
His twin George shouted good naturedly," Maybe they've all been sent to live in the forbidden forest."  
" Maybe they've all been turned into ferrets," giggled Ron before starting into his bacon.  
Harry, Ron, and Hermione finished before any one else and started walking towards class.  
"But I can't understand. How did they miss Malfoy," asked Hermione, puzzled.  
" You think you're so smart, Granger," said Malfoy," Do you really think I need to cheat on a potions exam. I merely took my test early so that I could practice Quidditch, not that I need to. Unfortunately, some of the other Slytherins accidentally saw my paper before I threw it away. I am sure I can straighten the whole thing out with Professor Snape. He's quite understanding you know."  
"Oooh," groaned Ron as Draco sauntered away," I'd like to."  
" C'mon, we don't want to be late to transfiguration. It will be much nicer today without the Slytherins.," said Harry.  
Transfiguration was much nicer as was Professor McGonogall. She was quite happy that none of her Gryffindors had been cheating. She didn't even comment when Neville transformed his turtle into a punch bowl instead of an ash tray.  
Ron and Hermione had gotten good seats at the Quidditch game. This was quite easy as a quarter of the student body was still absent. However, everyone looked shocked when Lee announced over the microphone that Gryffindor would be playing Hufflepuff because the Slytherins had been banned from playing for the rest of term.  
The Gryffindors were winning easily. Fred and George had even started playing a version of volleyball with a bludger to entertain themselves. Suddenly, the Hufflepuff seeker, Aaron Cauldron, shot like a bolt of lightning towards the ground. He had spotted the snitch. Harry, meanwhile, was rocking back and forth on his broom, holding his stomach and turning red.  
" Harry, the snitch!" screamed Katie, the Gryffindor keeper. Abruptly, Harry swooped towards the Hufflepuff seeker. Only by flying upside down directly underneath Aaron was Harry able to grab the snitch fluttering wildly by his kneecap." Gryffindor wins," shouted Lee excitedly. It was the closest Hufflepuff had ever come to beating Gryffindor since their old seeker, Cedric had died.  
" What's the big idea, Harry. You almost lost the game," screeched Hermione.  
" I, I couldn't help it," panted Harry," When I was flying up there, I looked toward Hagrid's cabin. Sometimes he watches from the roof. And I saw." Here he started laughing uncontrollably.  
" Saw What," demanded Ron impatiently.  
" The Slytherins. Beet Red. They were mucking out the cages of the blast ended screwts. Goyle threw a shovel full of manure and hit Draco in the head!"  
At this Ron and Hermione also dissolved into hysterics. They only stopped after they ran out of air.  
"But how did Malfoy get caught? He didn't even change color," said Hermione.  
"The dumb git probably confessed to everything thinking Snape would let everyone off the hook." said Harry, "I guess Snape isn't in an understanding mood today."  
With that they walked off the Quidditch field to join the party they knew was going on in the Gryffindor commons. 


	5. Third Place

The Lecture

   Thanks to all my reviewers. Hugs reviewers!! I still don't own rights to Harry Potter so I ll publish next chapter anyway.

      Behind Hagrids cabin the Slytherins were shutting the last of the blast-ended screwts back into their cages. The students were filthy, weary, and covered in soot. They slumped against each other in relief.

   "How do you like being game keepers," said Professor Snape, pleasantly strolling in the yard," It will likely be the best profession you can get into if you are no better in your other classes than at potions."

  The students stared at each other sheepishly.

      His voice rose in anger," Can you imagine how disgraced I was to see each of your papers, Slytherins from my own house, come out the potion red! I imagine that many of you, like Malfoy, thought I'd turn a blind eye to this behavior. After all ambition is highly prized in our house, correct?" Several students nodded their heads in assent.

   " Then let me tell you something," he continued," ambition is NOT getting what you want in the easiest way possible. I know that my pupils are smarter than all the other houses total. Tomorrow you are going to start proving it after dinner you all are going to study three hours in the dungeon every night until you are able to make your own tests, never mind cheating on one."

   Crabbe, Goyle, and Malfoy dragged themselves up the stairs to bed. 

   " I know who is responsible for this, Potter," said Malfoy," He's going to pay for this. The Bloody Baron will see to it." 

    Harry had raced back down to the Quidditch field. Apparently when he rolled upside down to catch the snitch, one of his glasses lens had fallen out. He told the others to go on up without him he would be straight back. As he walked out past the bleachers, he saw a boy sitting on the ground polishing his broom and looking forlorn.

   " Hey you haven't seen my glasses lens have you? I lost it during the game," he said. The other boy looked quickly up. It was Aaron Cauldron, the seeker he had just beaten.

   " Here," he said reaching into his pocket," It must have fallen in my robes when you were underneath of me." He looked back to his broomstick and started polishing again.

   " Gee, thanks. You were really great today. You almost had me," he said.

   Aaron said," That's only because you weren't paying attention. You know I love playing for Hufflepuff but I hate coming in last all the time."

   "Well you won't be last this year," said Harry kindly.

   " We won't," asked Aaron.

   " No that'll be Slytherin. I still can't believe that Snape canceled the rest of their matches. Would you like to come up to Gryffindor for the party," Harry said.

   " Sure," He said," let me put my broomstick up."

   Harry and Aaron waked towards the common room. Harry gave the password "honesty". The room was packed with Gryffindors chugging butter beer and eating every kind of candy imaginable. Neville was chasing a chocolate frog around the floor on all fours. Come back here I want to eat you!

   " What took you so long 'arry," said Ron.

   "Cauldron probably challenged him to a rematch an' has been wiping the field with him all this time," said George, jokingly.

   " You did very well today," said Hermione, blushing," Hufflepuff is lucky to have such a good seeker."

   The night wore on and the Gryffindors asked Aaron endless questions about Hufflepuff and passed him plates of candy. Finally, everyone became tired and Aaron headed back to his commons. Maybe third place was all right after all.


	6. Domestica Servilus

DOMESTICA SERVILUS

Thanks to my reviewers. You remind me to keep updating and stop reading the 5 book over and over. Oh yeah no permission to write fanfic and no spoilers included.

Harry tossed fretfully in his bed, unable to sleep. Someone had turned the heat down. Was it worth getting out of bed for? His whole body was suffused with cold and his arms and legs constricted in a ball. Wide awake now, he quickly looked up. The Bloody Baron was floating above him tying knots in an icy translucent fishing net. Harry was too terrified to scream as he was lifted and carried out of the window to the grounds below.

The Bloody Baron dropped him to the ground and wordlessly glided away. Harry looked around. Ron was sitting beside him, bound in a similar fashion, and Slytherins including Malfoy and his sidekicks surrounded them.

Wondering what weÕre going to do to you and your pathetic supporter, Potter, asked Malfoy coldly.

Well at; least you canÕt poison us unless Daddy Snape let you keep the answer key from the last exam, said Harry, trying to sound braver than he felt.

Oh, weÕve gotten better in potions, said Draco, smirking, What we really need practice in is transfiguration.

Raising their wands in unison, the Slytherins began twirling them in a circle to produce a purple cloud, which clung to Harry and Ron covering them from head to toe. DOMESTICA SERVILUS As the smoke cleared Harry and Ron stared at each other, their mouths agape.

Harry, squeaked Ron, WeÕre, WeÕre É

House Elves, finished Draco, smugly, But you still need a bit of work. 

Harry felt a familiar drowsiness wash over him. YOU WILL NOT REVEAL WHO YOU ARE. YOU WILL SPEAK AND ACT LIKE A HOUSE ELF. Said a commanding voice in his head. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? Vaguely Harry and Ron nodded, unable to resist an imperius curse performed by so many wizards.

DonÕt worry, said Malfoy, the imperius curse is only illegal to use against wizards, not house elves. Oh and donÕt forget to make my bed. 

RonÕs long, thin arms were soaked in greasy dishwater as he scrubbed the breakfast dishes. He looked much like any other house elf but for the large, deep green freckles on his cheeks. He was wearing a gingham curtain tied around his waist like a skirt. He and Harry had been on their way to find Dobby when Filch had set them to work in the kitchens.

If I ever gets out of this mess, said Ron, IÕll be dropping a hundred stink bombs on his office! 

Ron started banging his head against the counter top. Harry dashed to the sink and pulled Ron away from it.

You mustnÕt breaks the dishes, said Harry, wiping tears of frustration on his tablecloth robe.

Besides, added a squeaky voice, Professor Dumbledore doesnÕt allow his elfs to punish theirselfs. 

Dobby, they said happily.

Oh yes. You two is the new elfs. Dobby doesnÕt know your names. What does you call yourselfs, he asked happily.

We canÕt say, sir, said Ron, miserably.

We was never told our name, Harry added hastily, before they were compelled to punish themselves.

You will be needing names, said Dobby thoughtfully, I will takes you two to see Professor Dumbledore after dinner. He is a great one for thinking up names.

Ron and Harry beamed happily at this remark. Dumbledore would straighten this mess out.


	7. Never Fully Dressed

  Never Fully Dressed

  Same disclaimer as other chapters. Still working on formatting.

    The rest of the day went miserably for Harry and Ron. Even the people who were kind thoughtlessly ordered them around. House elves got no respect. They had had to bathe Hagrid's nifflers six times before he was satisfied. The Slytherins were much worse. They had made Harry and Ron do things like ' clean the dust from their shoes' and ' wipe the sweat from their foreheads' all day long.

   No one recognized the two new elves all day long. Surprisingly, Harry's scar had disappeared with his transfiguration. He had only a single, pink dot on his forehead now. It was dinnertime in the great hall. Harry was being forced to bring more ice for the Slytherins' drinks while Ron cooled them with a paper fan.

   Hermione was glaring angrily from across the room.

   " That's it! They've been picking on those two new elves all day," she said.

   " Settle down, Hermione," said George.

   " Yeah," said Fred," They're probably having the time of their lives. House elves love taking orders."

  Without another word Hermione ran over to the Slytherin table.

   " You leave them alone," she said in a quiet, scary voice.

   " Looking to make friends with the house elves," Pansy Parkinson sneered," They probably won't mind that you are a mudblood."

   " Go on," said Draco," tell your friend Hermione how much you love serving Slytherin, a proper wizarding house."

   Hope sprang anew in Harry's heart. Finally an order he would enjoy taking.

   " We hates it miss," said Harry," We can't stand taking orders. We wishes to be free, like Dobby."

   Hermione smiled widely. At last, the other elves were learning about freedom. But she didn't have any clothes to give them. Hermione threw caution to the wind. She wouldn't let a little pride stop her from freeing these brave elves. She threw her hat to Harry and stripping off her robe threw it to a shocked Ron. With a loud popping noise they regained their original shape. Unfortunately they split the curtains and tablecloth that the Slytherins had replaced their robes with. All three of them were standing in their underwear in front of the entire school! That is how Professor McGonogall found them when she walked up.

  " I think you had better come with me," she said firmly.

   After explaining, for what seemed like hours, she sent for their robes and dismissed them. Her eyes were ablaze with anger.

  " Thanks a million Hermione," said Harry with relief.

   " Yeah, thanks Hermione," said Ron," Can you come up to the common room to see us later. Only I want about a million SPEW badges."


	8. the end

Much to the Gryffindors disappointment, the Slytherins weren't expelled. On the contrary, Snape seemed very pleased with their progress in transfiguration; and as they already spent three hours a day in the dungeons with their headmaster, detention seemed repetitive. Instead Dumbledore came up with a unique punishment. For one week the Slytherins had to cook dinner for the house elves and clean the kitchens.  
" Poor house elves," Ron remarked," They didn't do anything wrong."  
Hermione agreed but she couldn't help enjoying the looks of resentment on Malfoy's face. The rest of the year was pretty uneventful. Gryffindor won the quidditch cup (no surprises there) followed by the Ravenclaws then Hufflepuff.  
Then it was time for summer vacation. Ron, Harry, and Hermione were sitting in their usual compartment talking about their plans. Ron and Harry were trying to figure out a way for Harry to spend the entire summer at the Burrow.  
" Just pick up Ron's luggage and follow him. I'll disguise you as a house elf," offered Hermione sweetly.  
Ron and Harry chased her through the train hitting her with lemon drops. 


End file.
